Relationships will not be murdered if two people are fighting for it. However, isn’t it annoying (and heartbreaking) to be provoked to end it? Based on my very minimal and messy relationship experience, these are the usual relationship murderers that may appear to be just a little bug, but could really end as a deadly virus. Stop it, before it stops the relationship.
(This applies to guys too.)
1. Trust Issues
As much as we find it cute to have someone that is so scared to lose us, it is also very annoying to have someone ask you where you are and then ask for a proof that you’re really there. Trust issues may be caused by something a person did in the past, but the question is, why are you with him now when you have not forgiven his past? What’s the point of claiming you love someone, but still holding a grudge against them?
A little jealousy spices up a relationship but it also could be very harmful. When your jealous, you could possibly say hurtful words, or be involved with a fight against a person he is only friends with. Also, continuously being jealous could make him just want to cheat because you’re already jealous anyway even if he’s doing something right or wrong, so might as well do what’s wrong.
As for my experience, I have always been paranoid. Probably because I was insecure and worried. And I can say that the cure for trust issues is meeting halfway. If a girl is jealous, she must lessen it and learn to calm herself down before harmful words and catfights could take place. On the other hand, the guy must also be able to secure her, assure her, instead of simply getting mad at her for having less trust.
2. Open Wounds
Open wounds cut by your lover’s former lover. No matter how much you try to heal it by your touch or patch it with your love, it never seems to heal.. because he’s continuously caressing it. It is hard competing with someone who already left, you either fight back or realize that a person like you don’t deserve a competition in his heart. You could leave if he’s making it too obvious that he still has not let her go or you could stick around, cling to the love he has for you until he heals, until there’s only you.
This may be just a little challenge but this could be the death of a relationship especially when that former lover is so willing to take him back. That bitch.
If your lover has this reputation of being a ladies man, or a “fuckboy”, then you better brace yourself. You could either believe the rumors and leave, you could believe it and wait until he changes, or you could not listen to the rumors at all. It’s honestly your choice, but if you ever get hurt don’t ever question your worth. You may have been stupid for still falling for him despite the red flags everyone around you raised — but don’t you ever question your self’s beauty, personality and ability, just because you can’t cure his itch.
Some people are just born with an itch that takes tons of girls to satisfy, you can try curing that itch, or you can leave. People have the ability to be really stupid. Relationships need apologies and forgiveness most of the time. Do you value the person and the relationship to fight for it? Are you willing to get hurt just to kick that itch out of your relationship? Is he worth it? It really is your choice, all i am saying is this itch is deadly and you must always be mindful for the signs of it so you could kill it before it kills the relationship.
It is okay to pretend that you’re on a very strict and healthy diet on your first few days, but 6 months gone and you’re still pretending? I am not gonna say that you should not be in a relationship where you have to pretend every now and then, it’s just that, don’t you like to be yourself and be comfortable with that person? Small pretentions could later lead to major deceptions.
5. Being too complacent
Being so sure that he won’t leave. Girls usually do this. Probably aquired from the movies, girls have high expectations of what a guy must not and must do.
Get yourself a guy who.. *lists actions including being given expensive gifts*
It is good to be aware of what we deserve, but it is dangerous to think so high of oneself and expect (worse, demand) too much of what you truly deserve. Without knowing, girls could end up bossing around their lover. Girls, dudes have needs to. You can’t tell him to buy you things Christian Grey gives Anastasia Steele. You can’t expect him not to hang out with guys just because you said so, just because you want to. You are his girlfriend, and you are not someone who will provoke him to do things he shouldn’t be obliged to do just to prove that he’s in love with you.
And for the guys, don’t be too dependent with the thought that a girl who is madly in love with you will not leave you. She may be head over heels with you but once she’s fed up and once she’s treated so bad, she has the tendency to give up.
I think those are my top relationship murderers. “Itch” killed my most recent relationship but i think the other 4 had its great deal of contributions. Thanks for reading!
I am no relationship expert. This is just what I learned from my mistake.